I'll preface this post by saying it loud and there is no way of ignoring it.
I am today what I was not last week!
Last week was a load of sh*t packaged in a nasty brown box, tied up with bow of entrails. A series of painful kitchen accidents, dashed hopes, heartaches, cancelled itineraries etc.
The good news is, I am still alive, not spontaneously combusting, and learning to leave the trail of bollocks behind and move on with a semblance of ... I don't know,
something positive
.
When I hit the abyss, a few things helped me -
1. Read this
that reminded me, even when all else breaks down, I can
still make a yummy cake and sit by the window and visit a far away land, tea and cake in hand
. So, I proceeded to do just that and revisited
with blackberries.
2. A text from another friend who was insistent that it was all just a '
question of perspective
' and if I wanted to I could
press reset, empty my mind, change perspective
. I was tempted to write this off as another cliche but for some reason, I decided to give it a try. Perhaps, it was that the text actually made me laugh and in that moment, transformed me.
You know who you are.. thank you!
3. I was by this time, dead stubborn to avoid the one thing that usually reset my mind into a happi
er
state, viz. baking/cooking/pottering in the kitchen. I just wanted to sit on the couch and wallow in self-pity. The combination of the two above actually made me
turn my back on the devil inside
, get my ass of the couch and whip up a delicious
Ramp Tart
for myself and then
as well.
I proceeded to eat it all and then made a list -
1. On the question of meaning of my life - I don't know, yet, but I have to
live and experience
to find out, don't I?! I live because I can and I should and pain is unavoidable, and perhaps, essential, part of that. So, I just have to learn to accept, endure and take it as it comes.
2. I have always been a control freak with an OCD tendency to plan. I should learn to
let go
. Not easy but desperately holding on to fraying fragments of past details does me no good.
3. Signed up for this
, starting next week. I am super pumped! I will try to capture my experience here post and of course instagram is going to be a constant companion!
4. Am scheduled to do a few
photography projects
through the year that makes me happy.
5. I am hoping to, finally, attend
organized by my very talented friends every year.
6. Wrote (with pencil and paper, yes!) down a nice long
list of recipe ideas
I want to execute and share on this blog over the next few months. Some of them involve
new techniques
that I am excited to experiment with. Some of them are cool ideas that need
collaboration with friends
and will also push my creative boundaries both in food and photography! I am looking forward to put them out here and find out what you think!
7. Realised I am plateauing a bit on my photography and need to push myself to the next level. I have a few ideas in mind and am curious to see how they take shape.
Other things that make me happy, every day -
There is a
new life born every day and there is new hope
. Congrats to
and her boy friend on their gorgeous baby! The little boy makes me smile :)
I am incredibly proud of
Regula
; she not only perks me up with her food, but apparently
too! She is his favorite blogger!
Hats off darling, and totally derserved! Regula's research into every recipe she shares and her absolute passion for British food is such an inspiration! Also check out
here; such creative minds and the article reflects it!
I am exhilarated to
have the love I want from those whom I want it from
. I don't know if I say it enough, know that you are appreciated for all the
little things
, the flowers, the walks, coffees, lunches and dinners, the phone calls...
the presence mean much
and I am incredibly grateful for it! :)
And, I am so thankful for the
power of language
, for how would we resolve without it! ;)
Ramp and Parmesan Tart for One
For the crust:
1/2 cup spelt flour
about 2 T cold butter
pinch of salt
pinch of cracked pepper
few tsp almond milk
1/2 tsp baking powder
For the filling:
3 ramps cleaned and diced fine + a couple as garnish (optional)
1 pheasant egg (It is about 2/3 the size of a chicken egg and so for perfect for this single tart. I happened to have it. If you don't have a small egg, use just the yolk)
1/4 cup almond milk
1 T mayo
1/4 cup fresh grated Parmegianno Regianno
salt and fresh cracked pepper to taste
Preheat the oven to 375F.
To make the crust, sift together the dry ingredients. Rub the butter into the mixture to form a coarse meal. Add the almond milk, one teaspoon at time until a dough just comes together. Refrigerate the dough ball for about 15 minutes.
Whisk all the filling ingredients together. Roll out the dough to a quarter inch thickness. Line the dough inside a 5 inch tart mould. Freeze for five minutes. Pour the filling into the shell.
Place on baking tray and bake for about 15 or so minutes until the filling is cooked and the crust is golden brown. Release from mold and eat!