That photo was taken literally moments before, well, Atlas shrugged.....! For reference, check last photo of post. One thing I have been confident of, perhaps a little too much, was being able to get that 'money shot' on the go... By that I mean winging it, setting things up on the fly, scrambling to get the shot before hell breaks loose and really testing the limits. I don't always do this on purpose. By that I mean, I am not lazy; it mostly is a culmination of circumstances - tight spaces, too many things to shoot, not planning ahead, not having the space and time for an advanced style set up and certainly no room between window and sink for camera, tripod and photographer (me)!
less may be enough for them but I sure as hell can do a lot better for myself!!!!
The reality actually is that I wing a lot of things in life. Ask my bosses; I have walked into sales meetings without what others may deem insufficient prep but I am generally rather fine because I know the subject rather well, usually choosing to play from a position of strength. Also, in a weird form of sexism, being a woman and mostly facing men on the other side, they inevitably underestimate my capacity and understanding of the subject. So, even if I knew a fraction of what I actually did, I would coast rather smoothly. Usually, the interaction go thus -
Client/Person from supposedly cooler firm like Goldman: bluster, hand waving and mild intimidation by title, essentially conveying that I couldn't possibly enough to participate and thus should just listen and nod
Me: Explain with logic and reason.
C/P from G: Flabbergasted, quickly masked (by the good ones) or changed to surprised admiration that I put together a cohesive sentence. Followed by gentler form of coercion
Me: Raised eyebrow(s), smile and more logic
C/P from G: grudgingly acknowledge I know something after all, wonder how someone in heels and skirts with leggy-ness all around could spout business. All this done mentally but I can see the flickering thoughts in their eyes, while they pretend to read the proposal I had given at the beginning of meeting.
Me: Mentally sighing and wondering if I can squeeze a coffee with my best friend who worked on the floor below before the next repeat exercise of the same.....
Many deals and strategy convictions later... I have come to the conclusion - It may be enough for them but I sure as hell can do a lot better for myself!!!!
By which I mean, just because I can get away with less, it is no excuse to strive for more. Of course, in things that I am actively engaged that is a default. But, the real test is when it is not all that interesting, important or influencial. Someone once told me - No matter what you do, do it with a whole heart and an fully engaged mind. Without expectation, without abject ROI calculations.
I tried communicating all this philosophizing to the cat but I suppose she couldn't care less.. Sigh.. Cats!!!
Opening to the now, without needing to know the later and yet be mindful of before....
Oh yes, I have been hot headed and coldly rational in my time. That person who said that rather life-hacking quote, I do remember doing the raised eyebrows and pouring the logic how that made no sense and how one much carefully assign the scare resources of dedication and diligence to the select few projects that have a higher probability of optimal results. Yes, I can hear you..blah blah blah.
But, for the twenty something me, that made absolute sense. I was working 16-18 hour day; who had the bandwidth for more heart felt work ethics?! But that young, not-so-wise me, had yet to realise the weight of courage and following a path despite no ROI positivity or any semblance of even a path from here to wherever tomorrow may happen. That is the road for the courageous and strong. That is the road for those who are prepared and think ahead. For those who give themselves unto the present and the moment and throughly make the most of it - in giving as well as receiving.
So, that is what I needed to do. Open myself to the now, without needing to know the later and yet mindful of before....
And, that was the inspiration I had as this stack of sandwiches toppled in front of my eyes and there I was, standing legs to wide apart (too small a space to squat, trying to get 45 degree angle shot) to react fast enough! Life works in very interesting ways, me thinks. If all it took was bread that took a tumble for me to get a life lesson, I take a sandwich everyday!!
The irony of all this is that, the whole tuna sandwich thing was about basic comfort, average nonchalance and simple everyday. And, the reason being I wanted to revisit I fondly remember; when I lived in Tokyo and this was snack of choice on Saturday afternoon strolls with my then best friend along with Seattle's Best coffee and a lot of fun conversation...
Who knew within its humble filling, it packed such philosophical punches? I mean, I could even write a whole book about it, with that catchy title that I started this post with! It encapsulates everything - humility, the state of the world and simplicity of an average American lunch. A perfect storm for a best seller, don't you think?!
Ok, ok, I think a girl is allowed a little fantasy, especially after such huge openings! Truth is, this is an awesome sandwich, fallen or perfectly stacked! It is fresh, rich, full of all the good stuff, soft in the center and crunchy everywhere. And, it comes with a side of Epiphany!
Just like the perfect man..... ;)
Toppled...! Oops. The top quarter decided the boat was too rocky and this whole shoot was a bit much for it. And, so she fell. Oh well!
The Ironic Tuna salad Sandwich
{makes two sandwiches}
For the tuna salad:
1 can of tuna preserved in oil
1/2 small red onion or 1 shallot
3 T red bed pepper, diced in 1/2 inch cubes
4 T hummus
1 T mayonnaise or mayo
1/2 lemon juiced
2 tsp sriracha or other hot sauce
The rest:
slices of cucumber, tomato, and avocado as desired
lettuce leaves
pinch of any fresh herbs you have
4 slices of pullman loaf or other sandwich bread
Lots of butter to toast
To make the filling, add all the salad ingredients, including the oil used to preserve the tuna, into a bowl.
Gently fold them in turning just to incorporate. I don't use more salt as the tuna has enough to go around!
I also like to leave the fish in small-ish chunks to give the sandwich bite.
Now, slather the bread on both sides with generous amounts of butter.
When ready to assemble, layer the cucumber, lettuce and tomato, plonk on a good sized amount of the filling. Finish with more slices and the avocado.
Top with toasted bread, slice in half, sit on the couch or stand by the window and just inhale deeply. Then take a big bite... Repeat!
Steady your soul and maybe have another sandwich. This is a good one to share, but also fantastic to eat all by yourself... all of it! Yes, you may!
